UFO Recession Tip 57 - Read Books for Free at the Library

Earthlings, during economic recession, libraries are a good getaway for enjoyment and information. The only negative is if you must drive to the library because the gas is so expensive. We hope you are smart enough to walk there or ride a bike. If not, then once you get there, read as much as you can.

One of the wonderful things about libraries is that you can read in a relatively quiet atmosphere. You do not have to worry about disrespectful Earthling teenagers causing noise pollution like they do if you went into a theater (which costs money). And you will not be guilt-tripped in buying a $5 cappuccino plus tip, as at your local Starbucks.

Libraries have a plethora of information for your perusal. You can even surf the Earthling digital highway for free (unlike you local Starbucks) but make sure you are not visiting porn sites. We made that mistake once

but the librarian let us get away with it because we are aliens and do not understand your human culture fully. We are told that some libraries will let you look at porn because libraries are notorious for being vigorously against censorship.

Libraries offer books and DVDs for checkout. And you can save a lot of money by reading the periodicals there instead of paying for newspaper and magazine subscriptions.

You will also save on your electric bill because you will be using the lights at the library instead of in your own dwelling. And you will be sharing lights with many people, which makes you be green like us.

Bring your entire family to the library. It is a wonderful way to enjoy peace and quiet and not worry about ringing cell phones or blaring TVs and music. We enjoyed it so much at the library that we asked the librarian if we could stay all night, there but the silly willy Earthling laws do not allow it. Although more and more people are attempting it due to home foreclosures during the recession.

Libraries are recession proof. Earthlings will never get rid of libraries, otherwise there would be mutiny. Since we are super-duper intelligent aliens, we have not learned anything new about technology in your libraries. However, it is an interesting learning experience reading about your odd Earthling culture and behavior.

Meet a new friend at the library. If you are a single Earthling, you may be lucky enough to meet your mate at the library. Just make sure you do not tell them that you go to the library to save money during the recession on your first date. Tell them you are being green and saving trees.

Quite PLEASE! Learning in progress.

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