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UFO Recession Tip 82 - Meditate Your Way through the Recession

Meditate_v1
Earthling, throughout the one million years we have evolved beyond humans we discovered the cheapest form of entertainment available to any species in the galaxy.

When you need to be entertained but do not have the monetary means to go to a theater, concert, restaurant, bar, dance club, or you just have not found that special person to share the joy of having sex, then entertain yourself with meditation.

Yes, Earthling, aliens meditate too. Meditation is not corny or weird. Most advanced species in the galaxy meditate. It has also been around on your planet for over five thousand years. Many cultures across your planet have used meditation to keep their human mind and body healthy. Next time you hear your human children or spouse complain that they are bored, tell them to meditate.

There are many meditation techniques. It is most green and cheap if you meditate in silence. However if you wish to have music, we recommend the meditation chants of the Gregorian monks. We also like listening to your genius human Mozart or Enya.

We do not recommend songs from AC/DC, Van Halen (despite the fact we like their music), or Hip Hop music, because those are not appropriate for meditation.

If you do not have the confidence to meditate we offer you this simple advice:
1. Comfortably seat your body.
2. Close your eye lids.
3. Inhale deeply and exhale slowly and completely.
4. Repeat the breathing exercises ten times.
5. Think about nothing. (This is not easy to do.)
6. If you cannot think about nothing, then think about the pleasant experiences you have had in your life. Think pleasant thoughts.
7. If this does not work, then think how much money you are saving by meditating. Visualize yourself laughing all the way to the bank because you are saving so much money.
8. Make sure the bank you are laughing all the way to is not going out of business.
9. If meditation about saving money does not help you meditate then find a partner of the opposite sex to mediate with in bed.

The Stellar Benefits of Meditation:
1. Cheap. You cannot spend money while meditating.
2. Relaxing. This is helps you get through the stress of recession.
3. Helps you be more creative. Maybe while you meditate you will thing of a creative money-making hobby to supplement your income during recession.
4. Helps you stay focused. This will helps you stay on course with your job and relationships. A big help during recession.
5. Higher consciousness. Do you know what this means? Anyone? Anyone?

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Comments

I love Yoga, and i feel good when i practice it , every one should practice it .


Sounds good and if a family was to put there mind to it the could save alot.

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