It's the Recession, Didiot!: UFO Recession Tip 62

Earthlings, we have discovered many humans are being ripped off every single day by popcorn conglomerates.

When you purchase pre-packaged microwave popcorn your paying for the cardboard box, cellophane wrapping and the paper bag of popcorn packed with unnecessary and unhealthy chemicals and fat. We think your really want only the popcorn.

Popcorn is a healthy snack! Do not ruin it by eating pre-packaged microwave popcorn with 10 extra chemical ingredients.

Pre-packaged microwave popcorn is fattening, unhealthy, ungreen and expensive. The only ingredient is the popcorn. Stop being Didiots! Do not throw your money away on silly willy fancy popcorn, especially during recession!

We are not telling you to give up your microwave and redevelop the long lost skill of popping popcorn on the stove. You will be utterly shocked at this. Very few people in America are aware of this tightly held secret, because you have been brainwashed by the popcorn industry for many years.

The cheap, easy, fast, green, healthy and non-fat way to make popcorn:

Simply pour 1/4 cup of popping corn into a brown paper bag. Fold down the top twice. Pop for approximately 80 seconds on high. Consume.

Yes, it is true. It is that simple. So have a lower grocery bill, stay slim, stay healthy and be green.

Here is the math:

1 bag of prepackaged microwave popcorn - $1.00

1 bag of popcorn popped in a brown bag - 9 cents

(1/4 cup popping corn is 8 cents, brown paper bag is 1 cent)

Think about this, humans, one 32 oz. bag of popping corn costs $1.29. You can pop 16 bag of popcorn with that! 16 bags of prepackaged microwave popcorn would cost you at least $12! Now think about the price of popcorn at movie theaters...hmmm.

Pop your own popcorn from scratch and impress your friends. Do not be a Didiot any longer.

Health note: The buttery flavor of pre-packaged microwave popcorn is poison. Check out this article on "Popcorn Lung" in USA Today.

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Comments

LOL...this awesome!
LOVE the theme!
Kudos and continued success...
9 cents, huh? Cool!

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Posted by: IQXS | May 05, 2009 at 08:11 AM

Hey, it works and the popcorn tastes better. Thanks!!! Greatest 'frugal tip' ever.

Posted by: Dick | April 19, 2008 at 05:17 PM