It's the Recession, Didiot!

Recession Tip 11 - Sell Old Clothes on Ebay

We have noticed Earthlings are obsessed about the clothing they wear. We are sorry humans have not yet evolved past wearing clothing like we have. We do not recommend you buy new dresses, suits or pants until the recession is safely over.

Your old suit may contain memories of bad board meetings, boring weddings, or other things you replay in your humanoid brains every time you pull it out of the closet.

Your old suit can become a new suit full of hope and potential to another Earthling. Whip it out of your closet, take some photos and make it a STAR on the information superhighway at a place called eBay.

If you do not have much to sell, try selling your underwear. We hear that there are some weird humans out

UFO Recession Tip 86: 10X Investment for 2009

Earthlings, stay away from Wall Street this year. Forget about putting your savings into banks which are being bailed out and bought out by your governments across the planet. We have figured out how any human can save money and make the right investment this year.

Yes, you can. Yes, we can. You can make money this year. This is not some Madoff get-rich-scheme. We are not sneaky, slimy, shenanigan, shyster meister financial wizards from Wall Street. We do not even have an MBA. However, if you have already read some of our blogs, you know we have vastly superior intelligence to your species. Please do not hold that against us. We are simply trying to help.

Human, after seeing Earthlings suffer in 2008 due to all the shenaniganisms, we actually want to say “Watts up!”  Help us to help you save you from Didiot Earthlings.

Earthling, the easiest way to make and save money this year is to invest into CFC light bulbs.

UFO Recession Tip 77 - Why We Love Pawn Shops

Earthling, do not be frightened of pawn shops. They might be your best friend during recession. At pawn shops you can purchase many kinds of useful things at bargain prices, sell your old junk for fast cash or get a loan against it. Remember, buying used is also green!

Not every pawn shop has a seedy, toothless character waiting behind the counter to take advantage of you. Pawn shop owners and employees are Earthlings too.

Earthling, we arrived without any of your planet's money after we were shot down by Bubba in Stephenville, Texas. So we pawned Meera's huge diamond ring.  We used part of the money to move to Los Angeles because in the city of angels, we thought we could fit in just fine. We were so right.

The other part of the loan from the pawn shop is being used to repair our saucer's Intergalactic Energy Power Booster so we can make it on time to our cousin's wedding. We only have 356 years to get there. It is going to be very close. We have to

UFO Recession Tip 73 - Top 10 Blogger Recession Tips to Make Money

Earthling, blogging is a highly enjoyable way to pass the time until we figure out how to fix our saucy saucer for intergalactic travel. We are highly intelligent, super-smart beings and we are one million years more advanced than you... but we do not hold that against you. We love Earthlings! We are happy to help you by offering tips on how to survive your economic recession.

We are marooned on this beautiful planet thanks to Bubba from Stephenville, Texas shooting us down. Do not be frightened of us. We only want to help you not be a Didiot. Blogging is the most efficient way for us to communicate with as many humans as possible.  We also offer green tips on how to save you planet from Earthlings.

ItsthePlanetDidiot.com - Green tips to save planet Earth from Earthlings
ZorkPlanet.com - Intergalactic VIP Lounge for green social network.

Competition is stiff. There are over 112 million blogs listed on Technorati at the end of 2007!    We see you and we know that not every blogger is making money.

Google makes hordes of money from bloggers using Adsense. In order to set the injustice straight, we offer 10 Blogger Recession Tips to Make Money.

Blogger Money-Making Scheme 1 - Bill Collector: As you build your blogging empire, working day and night, consider supplementing your income by simultaneously working part time job as a bill collector. The bill collection industry is going gang busters because there are so many good humans behind with their bills.

If you are one of the millions of bloggers, you may be behind on your bills and have bill collectors calling you, demanding money. If you can't beat them, join them. You can be on the phone collecting and write your blog at the same time. Multi-task, my dear Earthling.

Blogger Money-Making Scheme 2 - Baby Sitter: It is easy to blog while babysitting young humans. Blog while they nap, teach the kids to drop EntreCards for you. You can blog about baby sitting while you blog. One full circle of blogging.

Blogger Money-Making Scheme 3 - Dog Sitter and/or Dog Walker: You can double the money by taking care of animals such as dogs as you babysit and blog. The kids can help with the pets. Take pictures of the pets and blog about them. We particularly love Holy Cuteness web site. Please visit it for some cute entertainment.