It's the Recession, Didiot!

UFO Recession Tip 33 - Learn to Sew

Earthlings, why buy fashion when you can be fashion? Make your own cool and original clothing. People will not know it is not some schmancy fancy brand, because during recession Earthlings are too busy trying to figure out how to pay their bills.

Your friends will never guess you sewed it yourself. If they ask where you got your cool new outfit, tell them it is some new hot designer from Italy. They will be impressed that you are a fashion guru. Make sure you make up a name you can remember in case they ask you again.

Tips for NEW SEWERS: 

1. Find a used sewing machine. Many humans have sewing machines they never use. Ask if you can borrow to save the most money. If that does not work, purchase a used machine. Check eBay, Craig's List or your local newspaper's classified section.

2. Find an older Earthling, or someone else, who knows how to sew. Ask them to teach you. They will  most likely be happy to share their knowledge. If you must, take a sewing class - check with your local community college or fabric store. If you do not have natural talent for sewing, you might save money in the long run by taking a class, so you do not waste time and money sewing unwearable clothing.

UFO Recession Tip 24 - Learn to Knit

We want to thank you, Humans. We have never knitted before because, on our planet, most everyone wears the same outfit. Knitting has helped Meera and I find our inner self of creativity. Our relationship has become closer because we have spent time together knitting instead of watching television.

Knitting allows you to be creative and save lots of money on fashion clothes. Instead of going to Needless Markup (Neiman Marcus), knit your own clothes. Take the money you would have spent at the store and use it to pay off your debt during the recession.

Throw knitting parties. We have held knitting parties with Earthlings, which have allowed us to bond with you humans